VIRGINIA BEACH, Va. — Every year millions of Americans are hurt by domestic abuse, according to the CDC. That can be physical, sexual, emotional and mental abuse. That's why the Samaritan House in Virginia Beach is working to shine a light on the issue. This Domestic Violence Awareness month they stood with survivors as they spoke out at the 10th Annual Women Against Violence Luncheon.
After the event, News 3 sat down with keynote speaker April Hernandez Castillo to hear her story of teen dating violence.
Hernandez Castillo met her abuser when she was just 16.
"When you're in high school and it's your first love you are groomed at first and everything was amazing, but one day I was having a heated discussion and he struck me across the face. It just got progressively worse," said Hernandez Castillo.
She said it included hitting, choking and isolation that continued for years.
"It got to a point where I didn't think I would make it out alive," she said.
The abuse led to declining grades and suicidal thoughts.
"When we're talking to parents and really looking at the things and the signs those are huge signs. If your child is an extrovert and talkative and then all of a sudden since they've started dating a person their whole personality changes, that's a big red flag," said Hernandez Castillo.
The CDC reports 13 percent of teens who are dating experience dating violence and they're more likely to experience depression, anxiety, and substance abuse. CDC resources say it's important to have conversations with teens about what healthy relationships look like.
In Hernandez Castillo's case, the signs were there, though they were easy to miss.
"I was really good at hiding my abuse," she explained.
But she hit a breaking point. Though she said she didn't know quite how to get out of the situation, she gathered the courage and told her abuser she was leaving him.
"He ended up destroying the mailbox in my building, destroyed property, obviously because of his rage," said Hernandez Castillo.
And she didn't look back.
"Making that first choice, 'I have to leave' is one of the most profound and powerful choices you can make," said Hernandez Castillo.
Since then she's built her life. She became an actor, appearing on TV shows like Law & Order: SVU and Dexter, and authored a book, a memoir called Embracing Me. She's been married for 23 years and is a mother of two. After she processed what happened, began sharing her story — talking about one of her biggest successes: loving herself.
"If I can let you know that love is possible, success is possible, happiness and joy is possible after abuse, then I have lived out my purpose," said Hernandez Castillo.
If you, or someone you know, is dealing with domestic abuse you can call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-7233.
A local resource is the Samaritan House.
The Suicide and Crisis Lifeline is 988.
